Saturday, June 2, 2012

Lessons from Motherhood

Today my little girl turned 4 months old. Can she really be 4 months old?! It's definitely been mind boggling and a whirlwind, but the best 4 months of my life!

One year ago yesterday, Dave and I found out we were expecting a baby. There was a million thoughts racing through my mind a million miles a minute. Less than a week before we had just welcomed my adorable nephew into the world... and now I was going to be mom?

I had no idea then how much motherhood would change me. I'm sure there are a million more lessons I will learn, but so far, in my first four months, here goes...

First off, I've learned patience. I'm not a patient person! No matter how much you want that baby to be on the outside of your belly, you can't will the 9 months of pregnancy to end any faster. And then once the baby does get here, they grow SO fast... you kind of want them to {enter next milestone here} but then they reach those so quickly, you find yourself reminiscing, "I remember when she first {enter milestone here}." So patience to take each day at a time and to savor each and every moment, because they truly are fleeting.... and patience to deal with a fussy baby!

Secondly, I've learned persistence. Breastfeeding was not an easy experience for me. Recap of the first six weeks: inverted nipples, bad latching, cracked and bleeding nipples, plugged ducts, mastitis, two rounds of antibiotics, thrush (...twice), food poisoning, and decreased supply (....twice). There were many times the only way I continued and persevered was from the strength God gave me. I remember at one point it was a daily occurrence: Daddy holding a screaming, crying baby; Mommy bawling on her knees praying for the strength to feed the baby just one more time; and Daddy saying, "I can't sacrifice my wife for my child, I will get a bottle if I need to." But now I cherish that time with my daughter because of how hard I fought for it. I LOVE nursing my sweet baby girl. It breaks my heart to think just when we've hit this groove, she will be starting solids in just a couple months! [Confession time: I don't really want to pump and let anyone else feed her because I truly fought to be able to nurse her. I'm sure this is a big reason I can't pump enough. I will ask anyone who wants to feed her a bottle to subject themselves to six weeks of physical pain bordering torture and then I will gladly let them feed her a bottle!!]

And lastly, personal sacrifice. I've been told, I was a selfish person growing up. Becoming a wife and mother definitely teaches you to put those you love before yourself.... and appreciate my mother a million times more! I've sacrificed my waistline. {My abs are so far gone, whenever I eat I look like I'm 3 months pregnant again!!} I've sacrificed sleep, money, all of the memory space on my cell phone and computer.... but I would do it all again in a heartbeat and wouldn't change a single thing!

Motherhood has made me want to be the best person I can be and appreciate the sacrifices of my mother so much more. I've taken better care of my mind and body because I know one day I will be a role model to this little girl. I have studied my Bible more because one day she will come to me with questions. It's made me stay up past midnight many nights while everyone else is sleeping to wait for the washing machine to finish so that my sweet baby girl will have clean diapers for her bum in the morning! :) I sure do love my job!!

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